Happy Autumn, everyone!

Yes, it's true, I'm still here :)  I must apologize for my long hiatus...life is, as usual, very busy in the Hermonat household.  But we have survived soccer (6 kids played this year, in 3 leagues) and so things are a bit quieter here...Our next big adventure will be The Nutcracker, where my little Annika will be playing a "bon-bon" with her fellow students--I'm so excited for her!  She loves the stage, and can't wait to be out on it again...So now our Saturdays, and soon Friday nights, will be consumed with rehearsals until the shows.  But it will be worth it!

We celebrated William's 14th birthday this past weekend--good grief--14? Seriously?  Boy, how the time flies...sigh.  He had a sleepover with some friends, and I have a saint of a friend who so generously kept my little kids at her house overnight so that I would have a chance of getting some sleep that night, which I did.  Some people marveled at me having a houseful of pre-pubescent boys, but boys are easy.  God knew what He was doing when he gave me a whole baseball team, but only one princess-lol!

Recently I had the opportunity to get away for a long weekend with my friend Susan.  We spent almost 4 days at Cape Cod.  We both love photography and the ocean, so it was a great time spent scouring beaches for shells adn sea glass, and finding literally hundreds of photo ops.  On Sunday we took a ferry over to Nantucket--what a beautiful little island!  It was like taking a trip back in time, as the main streets were still the old cobblestone and brick, and were lined with huge, beautiful old trees that, left untouched after so many years, were able to grow unhindered and tall (those of you who know me know how I love trees, so this was so cool to see ;)  We saved money by bringing lots of snacks on the trip and only eating out for lunches, which were far more-reasonably priced.

I enjoyed my time away, but I confess the whole experience sort of backfired.  I kept focusing on using the time to get refreshed and renewed and to be able to come home and start fresh with the kids, the home, etc.  But I found that having time to think without the constant interruptions and distractions of daily life served only to give me time to think about the more serious things and situations of my life.  It was all good, but it did leave me feeling very overwhelmed and kind of blue when I returned home.  I am coping better now, with God's help.

As for my relationship with my male friend I mentioned in the earlier note, sadly, it was not meant to be.  He truly loves the Lord and wants to serve Him, but as time went on, we both came to realize that we have very different goals in life.  There were some hurt feelings on both sides in the end, but I am so grateful that God kept me from making a huge mistake.  And I have no regrets.  I have learned a lot about myself and who God has created me to be, and that it's a healthy thing to not try to please everyone around me.  It's so strange--most people encounter a "mid-life crisis" kind of naturally, but I feel like I had it thrust upon me-lol!  But God has taught me sooooo much in the past few years, and I am such a different person than I was not so very long ago, so I like to consider mine not so much of a "crisis" but of a "mid-life jump start." :)

Oh--I'm still enjoying my painting classes--very therapeutic!  I will try to post some pics of my paintings soon...

We seem to have gotten off to a good start homeschooling this year, for which I'm very grateful.  Things will start getting more complicated next year, so I'm just trying to enjoy the rhythm we've discovered for now!

Well, there is, as always, more to say, but I wanted to get something out here for you all to read, so you know that we are still alive and well.  Once again, thanks so much for all your prayers and thoughts--we are so blessed to have such an awesome family in Christ!

God bless,

Kim

PS--I will try to post some pics tonight--xanga hasn't been cooperating with me on this lately, but here's hoping it works!

I wanted to share a wonderful God moment with you all...

Last week I decided it was finally time to bring up a certain topic with my older children:  the idea of remarriage.  It has occurred to me that it would be good to at least start laying the groundwork for my kids and the possibility of them having a stepfather someday, should God be so kind as to bless me with another husband.  And since we've passed the two-year mark and seem to have settled into our new "normal," I felt it was a good idea.  I talked with William, Spencer and Connor about it, simply throwing the idea out there.  "You know, God has placed me as the head of this family for now, and if He chooses to keep me single, I will GLADLY continue to be the head of our family, but it would be nice if someday I could get married again and share my life with someone God has given me to love.  How would you feel about that?"  The answers were of the same theme:  "That's fine, mom."  "Sure."  "Whatever."  Hmmm...could it be that my kids are just THAT well-adjusted?  I think not.  But I think since there is not a tangible man in the picture, someone they can see or whom I am seeing a couple times a week, it is not something they can totally grasp as of yet.  That is fine...I'm just testing the waters, so to speak.

But the real sweet time came when I sat down to talk with Quin, my 9-year-old son.  He will sometimes come up to me and quietly say, "Mom, I just want to spend some time with you--just me and you--so we can talk."  And this means he wants to talk about his father.  I admit that other than some good hugs and immediate comfort, I sometimes am at a loss as to what to say to him.  But on this day, God really opened the door for me and the words just flowed.  First we talked about all the fun things we did with daddy.  Then Quin switched gears and began to talk about the things that his dad would never get to see him do, and things that they would never get to do together.  Then I prayed for the words, and this is what God gave me to say to Quin...

I started like this: "Quin, do you know how amazing God is?  He gave us hearts so big that we have room to love a lot of people.  Do you love just one of your brothers or sister?"

"No," he replied.

"How many of them do you love?"

"All of them."

"Of course, you do!" I answered.  "And do you knowwhat?  I have a special place in my heart where I will always love Daddy.  But God gave me a heart big enough to love someone else too.  You see, Quin, God made me especially for your dad.  And He made your dad especially for me.  But now that God brought Daddy to be with Him in heaven, he's going to make another man especially for me.  Isn't that great?"  He seemed fine, so I continued, "Think of it this way.  Mr. Baker comes to our house every week to take care of you, right?"

"Yes," Quin answered.

"Does he play with you and do fun things?"

"Yes."

"Does he have rules for you to follow?"

"Yes."

"Do you think he loves you even though he is not your dad?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's how it will be if I get married again.  He won't be your REAL dad, but he will love you like your dad did, and HE will love to play catch with you, and HE will spend time with you, and HE will help you learn new things."

Quin seemed to reach a turning point here--a change from the sadness of what he lost to the hope of what he could gain.

Then I explained, "God made Dads to be the leader of our families.  your Dad protected us, worked a job to provide for us, and helped us make important decisions.  Now that he's not here, I have to be the head of our family.  And if God chooses NOT to give me a new husband, then I will gladly continue to do that for us.  But it would be nice for mama if God DID bless me with another husband--someone to love me and to share with and to lead our family.

"But I promise you this, Quin.  I will keep praying that God sends me the special person He has for me.  I don't want to marry just anybody.  Just like someday, when YOU grow up and are praying for a wife, the Lord will have a lady especially for YOU!" 

At this, Quin giggled, then, turning serious, asked, "But how will I know when it's the girl God has for me to marry?"

"Well, you will have certain things that you want in a wife.  And you will pray, and God will show you the one."

"Mom?"

"Yes?"

"What do YOU pray for--for a husband?"  Such insight for a nine-year-old!

I answered, "Well, Quin, first of all, he has to love God more than anything or anyone else on this earth.  And then he has to love ME more than anyone else.  And then he has to love YOU!"  Quin smiled his famous big grin at this.  He asked me one final question..."What if he goes to places all over the world?"

"You mean, travels a lot?"

"Yeah..."

"Well, I don't know.  Why do you ask?"

"Well, I want someone to spend time with me."

"I promise you that the man I marry will want to spend time with you and with our family, Quin."

That was basically the end of our conversation, at least about dads and marriage.  But I was so very amazed at how his mind took it all in, and so grateful for the God-given words I was able to say to him...

This Father's Day marks the second one spent without Bill.  Again, I am able to look back and be so amazed at God's grace.  He has surely preserved our family and surrounded us with love and support.  Thank you to everyone who prays for us, who lends a hand, who tirelessly cares for my children, and a special thank you to the men who take the time to be a godly presence in my sons' lives.  We are so grateful!  I also thank my own dad, who does his best to make sure I'm OK and that we are taken care of.  And most of all, I thank God for being my heavenly father, who never changes, never leaves me...

As I look to the future, it looks pretty bright...I am being blessed by a special friendship with a wonderful Christian man right now...I do not yet know if this is the man God is preparing for me, but whatever happens, he holds a special place in my heart and I am so honored to be his close friend.  Keep us in your prayers, that God would do the leading, and not our own hearts...

Happy Father's Day to all of you dads out there!  God bless, Kim :)

OK, so it's been a while since I've blogged...I can only offer up the usual excuses: managing a home, kids, homeschool, and a whole host of distractions in between...Spring's been pretty kind to us so far here in the NE, and today I had the pleasure of breathing in the deep, sweet smell of freshly blooming lilacs in my back yard...ahhh!  And speaking of spring, it's garden-planting time here, and I have had a wonderful answer to prayer...I really wanted to try having my own garden this year, but was getting discouraged because we really don't have a sunny enough plot to work with, plus the soil is not very good for growing.  So I got the idea of helping out a friend who likes to garden and had the land, but needed hands to help plant, weed, and water...so I presented the idea to her and she was excited, and so now we are embarking on a shared garden.  It was a short time after this agreement that I received a phone call from a nice older gentleman who lives just a few minutes from here.  He and his wife grow a large organic garden and usually harvest enough to sell at the local farmer's market.  He is a friend of a couple who are friends of mine, and, well, long story short, he needs the extra hands to help him farm because he's getting older and more tired, and thought my kids might like to help him out and learn about organic gardening along the way.  Sooo, we are all excited here at the prospect of working two gardens this year and hopefully coming away with enough fresh produce to get us through the summer and maybe some canning/freezing too!

The kids are all busy and doing well, and we are winding down the school year here...they will have a short break, then some continuing school throughout the summer.  I'm considering implementing an "educational incentive program," which translated, means: the more schoolwork you do over the summer, the more priviledges/money/rewards you will get :)  I don't want them to have to spend half the fall reviewing everything they forgot over the schoolyear-haha!  Will is very much enjoying his baseball league, and I am so blessed by the coaches and families involved.  The head coach teaches with a firm, but fair style, and it is obvious that the older, more experienced players, have the utmost respect for him, and seem to know what his needs are before he asks.  And, in turn, the older kids take such pride in their team, and they teach the rookies what is expected of them and what it means to truly work together.  I am so glad that William has the chance to learn from them all!

The boys are enjoying their time at our neighbors' garden, and they tell me they are very helpful...I can only hope that the nice gentleman thinks they are more helpful than a handful, although he assures me that with a little guidance they are doing fine.

Annika is soon to be in her first ballet, and I can't wait to see it!  She, of course, only has a small part, as it's her first year in ballet, but I don't care!  I will appreciate her "5 minutes of fame" as her very proud mama!

The rest of the kids are doing fine...we recently celebrated Connor's 11th birthday and Hanson's 4th birthday with friends, and Connor and the older kids and myself joined up with our church's youth group for a further birthday celebration for Connor at a local amusement park, where we got to ride the rides and listen to some great Christian rock bands as well--it was a great day!

As for me, I'm still learning so much about God and what He wants for me.  I was blessed to enjoy a weekend away with a group of Christian ladies on retreat here.  I really needed the time away, and it was the perfect blend of time meeting and sharing with new friends and old, time spent with God, and time to myself.  God gave us an unusually gloriously warm spring weekend, and I was able to enjoy the campgrounds and the spectacular view of the lake.  I will try to upload some more pictures--I've not been able to "batch upload" so it is a painstaking process...

There is much that God is teaching me these days, and I am amazed at His promises and at His love for me...I look forward to whatever the future holds for me :)  That is all for now...I pray God has shown you His mercy and grace through whatever your circumstances are these days, and that you are enjoying being with your loved ones--live for today, because you never know what's coming tomorrow :)

God bless,

Kim